What is a Father?

Our Brother Franklin F. is ever-mindful of his bretheren, whether they are members of his home church or his classmates at City High. He shares with us, this wonderful essay on: What is a Father?

Daddy's home he can fix it!" Johnny exclaims. "Wait till your father gets home you are going to get it then!" Mother warns. If you are like most fathers, you have put in a long, hard day before you walk through the front door and may not be mentally prepared to be a fix-it man or a mean bear. The role of a father has changed a lot in our society since the beginning of this century. Once the aloof, autocratic provider, a father now finds he has a full-time job at home as well as at work. Your position in your home is vital to the stability and well-being of your wife and children. If you are fortunate, you have a job that you like, one that pays well and gives you time with your family. Many men are not that fortunate and must learn to meet their family's needs in less than ideal situations.

Your Job Begins at Home!

The Bible reminds us: "Like as a father pitieth his children, so the Lord pitieth them that fear him" (Psalm 103:13). Throughout Scripture, a father's responsibility to his family is continually emphasized. Of Abraham, God said: "For I know him, that he will command his children . . . after him" (Genesis 18:19). Jacob was commended for "blessing" his children (Hebrews 11:21). Joshua declared: ". . . but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord" (Joshua 24:15).

During the wilderness journey, Moses became overwhelmed with the responsibilities of leading the nation of Israel and meeting the needs of Israel and meeting the needs of each of its families. Therefore, God gave him a workable plan to expedite his leadership on every level. Moses was instructed to select a group of leaders (elders) whom he was to instruct. They, in turn, were to instruct the fathers, who then were to teach their own families. Thus, Moses was able to communicate his concepts, which were transferred down to every member of every family through the father's leadership.

Watch Out for the Enemies of Successful Fatherhood

Solomon observed: "A wise son maketh a glad father: but a foolish son is the heaviness of his mother" (Proverbs 10:1). Fulfilling your parental responsibilities will bless you and failing them will curse you. Watch out for the "enemies" of your family:

Occupation Blues: Failure at work will tend to carry over into your family life. If you are under pressure all day and are not handling it properly, you will often take out your frustrations on your family. This is the reason a Christian father must look upon his job as part of God's will and purpose for his life. Working is not an end in itself. Nor should it become little more than a means of income. Our labor should be done unto the Lord, so that even our everyday tasks take on a spiritual significance. We are to accept our place in life and do all things heartily as unto the Lord (Colossians 3:23).

Television Blahs: Beware of television; it will wreck you as a father. It is too tempting at the end of a rough day, when you are mentally exhausted, to just flop in front of the tube and turn off your brain! Television will rob you of vital creative communication with your family.

Devotional Bores: Keep your family devotions fresh and alive. Get out of boring ruts. Make sure that you are prepared. Read the passage in advance. Learn to study the Scriptures for yourself and then teach it to your family. Become a real man of God to your family and give them the leadership they need. Remember, "He that troubleth his own house shall inherit the wind: and the fool shall be servant to the wise of heart" (Proverbs 11:29). The very next verse declares: "The fruit of the righteous is a tree of life; and he that winneth souls is wise."

How is your "family tree" doing? Troubling your own house by failing to be a father who leads will result in a whirlwind of conflict. By contrast, producing the "fruits of righteousness" in your life will enable you to win your own children to Christ. Your children should want to become Christians because of the quality and character of your Christian life. They should not follow the Lord in spite of you, but because of you. To fail with your children is to fail at one of life's greatest opportunities.

There are basically four types of fathers:

Neglectful: Low in love, low in discipline. He avoids his children and flees all responsibility.

Permissive: High in love, low in discipline. He actually fears his children, who lead him.

Authoritarian: Low in love, high in discipline. He fights with his children and forces obedience.

Authoritative: High in love, high in discipline. He leads his children and fellowships with them.

A well-balanced father does more than just "bring home the bacon." He is a leader and a teacher who motivates his children to effective decision making of their own. He is not afraid to correct them when they are wrong, nor does he demand behavior of them that he himself is not willing to give. The authoritative father loves his children enough to give them what they need, not just what they want. He enjoys listening to them and helping them with their special projects. He is in fellowship with God and shares that fellowship with his children. This kind of father may claim the promise of Scripture found in Psalm 103:17: "But the mercy of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting upon them that fear him, and his righteousness unto children's children."

http://www.godsacres.org/msg.124.html